Superhuman – Be Fearless

Part of being human is knowing fear. No matter how much people might argue that it is necessary for our survival – no one can argue against the fact that fear is of more than just one type. There is this ugly mental fear (thoughts, overthinking) vs the quite useful physical fear (feeling, the adrenalin rush). Physical fear can save lives in dangerous situations yet mental fear slowly destroys them from the inside out.

To become superhuman, the key is not to be fearless, but to understand fear and where it comes from. Befriend it.

I used to have anxiety issues for a few years. Believe it or not, I still had them a few weeks ago. My anxiety problems began as soon as I wasn’t able to meet other people’s expectations. The disapproval of my personal decisions from closed ones had a tremendous impact on my inner world because I allowed it to. However, fate is such a funny thing. It doesn’t care about petty feelings. The way we feel about ourselves and others is purely our choice. Fate is very well aware of that. It doesn’t care about what people think is the best thing, it only cares about the right thing. And the right thing it will be.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not the type to worship fate, I am a firm believer that we are not victims of circumstance, by any chance, I would rather say fate is what we make it, yet … some things are predestined.

Both time and energy play a big part when it comes to anxiety issues. We might think we don’t have enough time to do all the things we want to do in life, or that things don’t go fast enough. We begin to lose faith, to feel stuck, we start to doubt ourselves and our path. The thing is that in most cases we have too much time on our hands with no suitable outlet for our energy to flow into. So we roam the realm of possibilities.

We begin thinking about the how’s and when’s wanting to control how things will enter our life, how we will achieve this and that – and because energy not invested positively turns foul and bitter – we get caught up in terrible thought chains in a matter of seconds. The final hit is when things don’t go the way we expected them to. Because this rarely happens. We feel like we lose our ground because we thought our plans were flawless. And if our plans don’t work, what will?

Expectations

The key to getting rid of crippling fear is learning to trust in something bigger than ourselves and move out of our way. We need to understand that we are not supposed to plan out every step of our journey. Our job is to make a decision and be clear on our goals. Let the universe handle the rest and enjoy the process. If life was all about goals and results – when and what would we learn in the meantime? Where’s room for personal growth in that scheme?

My anxiety issues declined gradually once I found a suitable outlet for my energy, which is this blog. I don’t have so much time to overthink anymore, I have something to look forward to because my energy is actually flowing somewhere. I learned to let go of wanting things my way and wanting them now. I understood the importance of self-exploration. And I am not anxious to experiment and try things out anymore because I finally gave up on perfection.

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A Reason To Celebrate

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This comes rather unexpected but I just saw the notification for the 100 followers Milestone on WordPress! Being here for a little over 1 month am in awe of the wonderful and supporting WP community! I’ve had a lot of fun expressing myself and exploring my mind, I’ve made some blogging buddies and I want to drop a big thank you to everyone who got my back on here, thank you for your support, for taking the time to read my little posts and comment your thoughts, thank you for your inspiring posts as well!

In celebration of this Milestone I am hosting a ‘Blogger Party’!

Here’s how it goes: drop the link to your blog in the comment section below and describe what your blog is about in a few lines – the thought behind this is for everyone who decides to participate to be able to find some new blogs to read and make new connections! Just because mutual support and ecouragement rocks!

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Just A Story #2 – Memories

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Our memories make us who we are. I close the book Paine bought yesterday and walk towards the window. The view from up here is breathtaking yet boring at the same time. It reminds me of a bustling ant colony. This place seems unreal.

Memories. Of course, I remember growing up, I remember the places I visited, the people I met … yet none of those memories is enough to give me a secure sense of identity. Looking down at the busy street I feel like this all is just a game, a wicked play designed to keep us separated from the source. Yet the people in this city seem so perfectly at peace. They fit in this world, all of them hold their place in it. They have families, friends. I see them fill the streets on the weekends. They do have a life, don’t they? Not that it’s perfect – I know they face struggles and feel pain. Yet the daily routine remains their first priority. These perfect citizen are built to preserve the status quo.

Nothing that I know about this place, none of the memories made here will change the feeling that there is so much more to everything than what we’re allowed to see. I feel as if the words I speak come out tainted. My mind is always busy finding the perfect pitch, will I ever be able to express myself freely, without the feeling of someone erasing my thoughts before I can speak them out loud?

My name is Erin White. And I committed suicide on a cold December night. At least that’s what the newspapers tell me. All of them. I can’t remember dying but the change of character, Paine’s appearance, all those stirred emotions and the confusion I find myself in show that something really happened. I did die on that night.

“I made you some tea.” Paine’s calm voice echoes across the room. “Come and join us, if you like.”

To be continued…

Previous Chapter

 

Everyone Needs A Good Friend – Be One To Yourself

I don’t have any Zip today, in other words: I’m so damn tired lately. Then I realized how much I am at war with myself again – thoughts, ideas, dreams and fears all pull in different directions. Restless. Of course I’m not the only one like this. We all have our phases. A few weeks from now I probably won’t even remember feeling like this.

People waste too much time beating themselves up about their own imperfections. How do they hope to achieve greatness while thinking lowly of themselves? What if we all decided to be at peace with ourselves right here, right now? Can you imagine treating yourself as a friend? Does thinking of this put a smile on your face?

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Empathy – A Victim’s Game

Empathy“the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experience of another […]”

flowerEmpaths are not as rare as many people would like to believe. Everyone is an Empath to a degree. The illusion of it being so special is that most people never really tap into this ability and those who do, tend to over-dramatize it for various reasons. If you do a little research on this you’ll quickly find that most articles tend to give off a negative vibe. You would think that being an Empath is quite awful as a lot of self-proclaimed prodigies tend to cry their eyes out complaining about how drained they feel because of all the negativity they are surrounded by.

I’m sure those people are nowhere close to being an actual Empath. They simply seek attention because their inability to deal with their own negativity makes them feel like this all happens because they are so special and psychic, too fragile for this heavy world. Sure thing, Earth is no angel’s dream but I am more than sure that when a soul chooses to come to Earth they are aware of what they’re getting themselves into.

Ability vs. Responsibility

You’ve probably heard that power comes with responsibility. A person who can’t take responsibility over their own emotions can never have the power to tap into what others feel without turning themselves into a victim – despite the situation having nothing to do with them. Now there are Empaths out there who aren’t quite aware of why they get so involved with other people’s emotions. However, they never present themselves as the victim of the situation. This can become apparent when the unaware Empath begins to over-dramatize the situation somebody else is in, ending up completely devastated by the thought of that person’s suffering.

While they pick up vibes from other people and take on the same energy as their peers, they have the desire to lift everyone up . This makes sense because doing so would result in them feeling better as well. Ironically, in many cases, the ‘sufferer’ ends up comforting the Empath in an attempt to prove that they can deal with the situation.

Relax!

The catch here is that the Empath is not a miracle worker. Even if that’s what they wish to be at first – they aren’t designed to make everyone happy but to guide people towards happiness. This is achieved through inner work – because no one is in control over our emotions aside from ourselves. We can get influenced by others but the final decision on how we feel about things is up to us. Empaths, in a sense, must learn to accept that they are powerless when it comes to other people’s hardships – even if they can perceive all of those things, they are in no position to decide when it’s time for someone to let go and move on. But they can stand by a person’s side and offer emotional comfort when it’s needed.

They must learn to take a step back and observe the situation from a neutral point of view without getting involved in it by picturing themselves as the sufferer. Many times it’s just a horrible fantasy and the true suffering is not as terrible as they imagine it.

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Just A Story

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Paine is my best friend. She’s the only being that keeps me sane in this dull, rotten place. I wonder how she can keep her stuff together surrounded by this madness. Oh, maybe it’s because she isn’t human. Why me? My thoughts are running wild yet I keep coming to the same conclusion over and over. I’m stuck, a prisoner of my own. Like a lost time traveller I feel out of place. Wrong era, wrong planet. Yet … I am here.

“Cheer up, sadface!” Her voice snaps me out of my seemingly endless trip. The deeper I go, the darker it gets, it’s tough to go back without a safety rope. “Paine, do you know what it feels like being out of place?” She gives me a cryptic smile. Of course you do. “Nothing ever is out of place, dear.” These words crush my heart. “You know it hurts when you say this.” I simply can’t ignore how I feel about myself, the world and my place in it. I’ll never belong, I’ll never belong.  “Your feelings can’t change the truth of who you are. You’ll have to learn to accept it.” She always smiles. I wish I was like her. Maybe that’s why she’s by my side – without Paine I’d be a gloomy little sadface, at all times of the day. Oh, and I’d probably die of chronic depression, too. See, I make no sense. But then again, what makes sense on this Rock Bottom planet?

To be continued…